1061 miles later...
Hi I'm Circus "Hambone" Brown, mini-bottle fiend and close friend of woodland creatures.
When I'm not elbow deep in synthetic plaster powders and up to my armpits in silicone grease I enjoy fishing and fucking rock and roll. Bar-Beefucking-Q is my specialty and if you get too close to the flames I won't hesitate to put some grill marks on yer worn out catchers mitt. What puts the huss in my get-up-n-go? Well it ain't sparklers sugar-dumplin'! Carbon-Fiber maybe strong and oh so light weight but it ain't got nothing on these ironsides! If you can't shuck-it or spray it down with WD-40 then why the fuck did you mass produce it China? Euro's sound so eloquent but there's just as much coke on them bills as there is in the till at yer local Sev-Lev. If you can't get breakfast anytime of the day then tell them chickens to pinch their cheeks till dawn. I saw Mr. Clean tossing salad behind the Harrah's but it was all right because we all agree with Toby Keith, we <3 this fucking bar and grill. Utah Fuck-Yeah! I'm almost home, put out the candles, make sure there's no shot glasses in the disposal and remember if it sounds like shit sober then I don't give a fuck how good it sounds fucked up.
Don't give me that Natty-lite, Rocky says its the shittiest bottled water you can buy.